Every person is different and many factors affect the loss of a cat. Age, personality and the specific circumstances sourrounding the loss will play a role. If you live alone and your cat was your companion it can be even harder. Everyone grieves in a different way. For some people grief comes in stages such as anger, denial, guilt, depression and eventually acceptance. For others it comes in cycles, varying from week to week. You cannot force grieve, you should accept it and live it. It heals and it is necessary. Still even years after, a certain event or a special anniversary can wake memories and trigger the sense of loss.
One of the most difficult parts of losing a pet is what others think. Some people may think "what's the big deal, it was only a cat, get over it". They assume a pet loss is not as traumatic as a human loss. The important thing is not to argue with them. Seek out others who have had pets and can understand what you're feeling.
Here are some tips that will help you cope with a pet loss:
- If you have no one available to help you cope with your loss reach out for help. There are pet loss support groups and message boards. Your family and friends might not understand but many other people have experienced what you're feeling.
- A ritual can help. Create a legacy, plant a tree, compile pictures or frame your favorite picture of your cat.
- Take care of yourself. The stress of a loss and the feelings of depression can deplete our energy and emotional reserves. Eat a healthy diet, get your sleep and exercise or take long walks. Exercise boosts endorphines which will help you feel better.
For a child the loss of the family cat may be their first experience of death. They may have a strong link with the family cat. For some children, the cat was around all their lifes. It is important to reassure the child. Some may feel responsible, try to explain they did not do anything wrong. Some children remember when they teased the cat and feel it's their fault. Talk to them and explain how the family cat enjoyed playing with them, who had the time and energy to do so. A child might feel very scared when confronted with death (they understand other people or pets they love may die). Comfort them and explain how life and death are related.
Do not rush to get a replacement cat for your child. They need time (just as you do) to be ready for a new kitten. Each animal is different, so trying to exactly duplicate your old pet will likely result in frustration and disappointment. A new cat should be appreciated fully for its own sake, not as a direct replacement.
Hopefully your cat still has many years to share with you. Kitty in NY is the perfect solution for your trips and holidays. We will be glad to help you find a loving temporary home in Manhattan, Brooklyn or Queens. Kitty in NY offers the best in-home cat boarding service in the city.